View from the chair

“The heart dies a slow death,
shedding each hope like leaves.
Until one day there are none.”

Do you wonder why?  Why does she stay?  I will tell you what I know.

Surely you too have loved someone. Have trusted. Have laughed. Have experienced disappointment. Have celebrated.  Have hurt.  Have forgiven.

It does not begin with pain. It begins with affection. It begins with love. It begins with trust. It begins with intimacy.

We were not so different from you. We knew the same things you know. We knew joy. We knew disappointment. We loved the same way you do. We hoped for the same things you hope for. We worked to build lives together. We wanted the life you have.

Most of us, too, are intelligent, educated, accomplished; professional. We, too, said if that ever happened to us we would leave.

Maybe you have had your love tested. Your trust broken. Made a choice to not walk away from everything you’ve built together. Tried again to make it work.

Our heart’s death begins slowly. A single snowflake as it flutters to the ground may cause slight concern. Considered on it’s own, a larger consequence is difficult to imagine. When all the snowflakes accumulate they form something difficult to navigate, but in the center we continue to try. The accumulation over time, when the strength of the snow pack is overcome by stress, produces an avalanche. At the point we are buried, we spend all our energy trying to find the way up and out.  We,too, find love hard to leave behind.  But unlike you, we must make the choice to leave love if we want to survive.

“The heart dies a slow death, shedding each hope like leaves. Until one day there are none.” – Memoirs of a Geisha

About Lisette d. Johnson

Murder-Suicide Survivor, Mom, Writer, Speaker, Serial Volunteer in the Intimate Partner Violence and Sexual Assault Arena, Entrepreneur, &amp Friend. I survived, my kids survived, and I am here to tell the story.
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2 Responses to View from the chair

  1. Lynne says:

    Very well done. Why do you keep the chair?

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